Fustia

Spare the Rod and Spoil the Child

Does Grandma love your child more than you do? “More?” you’d say. “Of course not.”

But Grandma never corrects little junior. Little junior is “perfect” in her eyes. She can recount every cute little memorable moment of his life. So can you, of course, and your love for junior is “perfect” regardless of what he ever does… but do you see him as really, absolutely “perfect” like Grandma does?

Well, at first, maybe, but then you realize you have to prepare junior for life. You have to caution him against running out in the street without looking. If you catch him stealing or lying, he has to be punished.

Why? So that he doesn’t get hurt; doesn’t get into worse trouble later on in life.

It’s often called “tough love” – love that is for his own good.

In fact, while Grandma certainly loves junior, it’s hard to say that “more” applies. After all, junior is your baby, not hers, and if you had to assign “more” love it would likely go to you, not Grandma.

Why? Because you love him enough to stop him from making mistakes.

And even if one could measure love, when Grandma see you punish her “perfect” little junior, you’ll hear “Was that really necessary? Don’t pick on him. Don’t you understand how perfect he is?”

And you know that yes, it was necessary, and that you are not picking on him… you’re trying to make him even better.

You’re not saying that junior is bad. You’re not “blaming” him. You are putting junior’s well-being first, regardless of how it makes them look to Grandma.

Tough love: it’s every parent’s joy and bane.

You do it because you love him enough to want the best for him. To give him strength and wisdom. To help him survive the reality he will soon enough have to face alone.

This is pretty obvious to any parent… so where am I going with all this?

Here:

Tough love is what Democrats do for their country: love it enough to try to help it grow and be strong. Love it at least as much as Grandma’s blind “perfection” – and just enough more to insist on tough love.

So, when Republicans say Democrats are blaming the country; say that they “don’t understand”, they are being like Grandma, and seeing junior as “perfect” and not like mom and dad, who know that the best thing is some tough love. This is a rugged world, and we need our country strong and wise… and just like with junior, we are doing it out of love, and pride and care.

Perhaps Grandma needs to be reminded of that.